According to Plan
by Mesita
Summary: Nat has watched Kevin and Double D dance around each other for so long that it's time to take matters into his own hands. But when Kevin bails on the "date" Nat arranged, it's up to Nat to show Double D a good time.
1. Chapter 1

**Notes**: Obviously I've got NatEdd on the brain. This prompt was written out weeks ago for applepencil on tumblr for winning a 100th follower contest. It just took an influx of NatEdd fanart on tumblr to give me the inspiration to write it!

Also, my family is going to the zoo today, so there's that. I hope you enjoy! Nathan Kedd Goldberg belongs to c2ndy2c1d!

* * *

Nathan Kedd Goldberg had flawless plans. They always worked. 100%.

That was precisely why he found himself texting Kevin and Double D simultaneously from a blocked number.

He couldn't remember exactly when he decided this was a good idea, but it was too late to back out of it, now. He'd watched his best friend shoot googly eyes at the class genius for weeks and he was fed up with it. Besides, what did Kevin see in that sockhead, anyway? Yeah, he was clever and his gap-toothed smile had some redeemable qualities, but he was kind of a smart mouth and hung around with this Eddy kid who had a tendency to be a douchebag.

Nat's plan was simple: to somehow coax Kevin and Double D to a surprise date to the zoo. He thought about sending them to the movies, but it was his experience that two hours staring at a screen and not at each other was counterproductive. The zoo was a perfect experience. They could bond over the elephants or something. Watch some giraffes poop. Perfect.

Kevin appeared hesitant in his texts at first, mostly because he assumed it was Eddy trying to scam him out of something. Double D jumped at the idea but only because he "thoroughly enjoyed the observation of once wild animals in a docile environment." Nat had to roll his eyes. Double D was totally in it for the learning and not the sucking face. He should have known.

And yet, when the time came for Nat's two test subjects to arrive at the rendezvous point, only Double D arrived. Nat watched from his position in the bushes as Double D paced awkwardly in front of a park bench and sighed loudly at his cell phone.

Annoyed at Kevin for being late, Nat opted to try and text him just to see where he was when his phone happened to light up with a text from none other than the redhead himself.

Apparently Kevin's father wasn't happy with his grades and grounded him.

Who grounded a senior in high school? Was that possible?

Nat was going to have a talk with Kevin about sneaking out of the house or possibly just doing his damn homework for once. In either case, that meant he had to tell Double D that the impromptu date was off.

Except… the poor guy looked so lost. Like maybe he wanted to see the monkeys but he also wanted to spend quality time with Kevin. It darn near broke Nat's heart so he could only do the next best thing—

-which was to step out of his hiding spot nearby and pretend to be talking on his cellphone. Nat was clearly the King of Smooth.

"—Oh yeah, man. I got the goods. Just shoot me a twenty and I'll get them to ya ASAP. Smencils don't come cheap, you know. And they stink up my entire fucking backpack so don't skip out on m- OH hey, man, I gotta go." Nat switched off his phone and stuffed it into his pocket. He secretly wished for a flip phone because it would make his entire act seem so much more plausible. It was hard to pretend-talk on a smart phone. "Double D! Fancy meeting you here!"

"Nathan," Double D side-eyed him. "In the middle of a park? In the middle of the day?"

"I like to walk and talk. Cardio, you know," Nat swung his arms about. Oh yeah, Double D didn't suspect a thing.

"In denim?" Maybe.

"Gotta look good all the time," Nat even completed his statement with his trademark grin. Double D continued to narrow his eyes at Nat and checked his phone a few times. Nat took that as his opportunity to jump on the subject at hand. "You waiting for someone?"

"I am supposed to meet someone here," Double D began, "But it appears he is late. Or perhaps, not coming at all."

"Ah, the old stand-up," Nat clapped his hands together and rubbed them. "Want me to wait with you?"

"That is not necessary, Nathan," Double D waved him off. "I am perfectly capable of—"

"Nonsense," Nat interrupted him. It was his fault Double D was out there, anyway. "If whoever it is doesn't show, then you and I can hang out."

"Don't you have a prior engagement?"

Nat stared at Double D, confused. He continued to stare until the filing cabinet in his brain finally located just whatever the fuck it was that Double D was talking about. "Oh! On the phone! Yeah, it's cool. He can wait."

"In that case," Double D shrugged. "I see no problem in you waiting with me. Should my date arrive, we will go about our business as usual. And should he refuse to make an appearance, I suppose spending the afternoon with you will not be too much of a chore."

"A chore? You kidding me?" Nat scoffed and took a seat on the bench that Double D had been pacing in front of. "I'm fucking awesome. Trust me, I'm probably a much better date than K—than whoever it is."

Double D gave Nat a look that probably said he knew more than he was letting on, but he stopped his pacing and sat down next to Nat on the bench. "How kind of you to offer your time for a mere classmate."

"It's no problem, man," Nat grinned. "I can't just leave you here alone if you're being stood up. I've been there. It sucks balls."

"You're so accommodating."

All of Double D's words sounded nice on the outside, but they dripped with a bit of false kindness, like maybe it was him who was playing the joke on Nat. Nat had sarcasm radar—he could spot a sarcastic comment from a mile away. He needed to get Double D off his trail, and fast.

"Soo…," Nat tried, "Who is standing you up?"

"Well, no one I hope," Double D grinned.

Ugh, so literal. "Let me re-phrase that. Who are you waiting for?"

"Ah," Double D said, his voice smug. "You should be more specific, Nathan. But to answer your question: Kevin."

"My Kevin?" Nat tried so hard to look surprised. He really did. It was just super hard when Double Genius practically had X-ray vision and could see into Nat's brain.

"You wouldn't happen to know where he is, would you?" Double D asked. He sounded coy. Could that little bitch pull off coy? He was turning out to be a better challenge for Nat than he thought. No wonder Kevin liked talking to him. Double D kept Nat on his toes.

"Nope. No siree. Didn't even tell me he was going out with you. Jerk." The jerk bit was a nice touch, Nat thought.

"I see," Double D nodded and turned away to look down the path—probably looking for Kevin. He seemed so calm, so serene. Like it didn't bother him one way or another that Kevin was totally standing him up. Didn't he like Kevin? Nat was pretty sure Double D liked Kevin. There were signs, after all! Notes being passed! And looks! And secret smiles! Nat saw them, he really did!

Rather than grumble to himself about how weird Double D was for not crying on his shoulder about lost loves, Nat decided it was probably in his best interest to just change the subject and enjoy himself because it wasn't every day he got to spend time outside of school with someone who wasn't Kevin.

"Want me to text him? See where he is?" Nat offered. There was no harm in that. He could text Kevin from his unblocked number. It wouldn't be unusual at all for him to be bothering Kevin on a Saturday afternoon for his whereabouts.

Double D sighed and put away his own cell phone. "That won't be necessary. I am fairly certain he will not be arriving, if he has not already." Suddenly his demeanor changed slightly, like he wasn't as sure of himself anymore as he swung his legs nervously back and forth on the bench. "Are you sure you still wish to accompany me for the afternoon?"

"Well, yeah," Nat said. "It's the least I can do, right? You probably had some awesome day planned and Kevin ruined it so it's up to Captain Nat to save the day!" Nat inwardly cringed. He was the worst wingman, ever. Wasn't he supposed to be hooking those two up? He was supposed to be saying wonderful things about Kevin, not calling him a jerk. He quickly remedied his folly. "I mean, er, I'm sure he has a perfectly valid reason for not being here."

"I'm sure he does," Double D echoed. "I'm just not sure you have a perfectly valid reason for _being_ here."

Think fast, Nat. "Well, originally, cardio, remember? And now it's my sworn duty as your friend to accompany you throughout your day and cheer you up, yeah?" Nat felt like he was in an interview.

Double D swallowed thickly. Nat only did that when he was nervous. Was Double D nervous? The very thought made Nat want to fawn all over him. "I was unaware of our friendship," Double D murmured.

"Hey, any friend of Kevin is a friend of mine," Nat pointed out. While it was true that he and Double D hadn't been the very best of friends, it wasn't like they were complete strangers, either. Nat had spoken to him a few times in the past, but it was always around Kevin. Sure, Double D was usually very polite, but wasn't he always? Sometimes? Mostly? Nat just kind of assumed Double D wasn't an asshole because Kevin spoke highly of him, but he could be wrong. He hoped he was wrong. Double D didn't look like an asshole.

"If that is the case, then I hope you are not opposed to the city's zoological park?"

"The what."

"The zoo."

"I know what you meant. Who the fuck calls it that?"

"That's actually the proper name for it. You didn't know?"

Nat took back everything he'd said about Double D not being an asshole. He very clearly was. Nat narrowed his eyes at him. "I wasn't opposed to it until just now. You're ruining it for me."

To Nat's surprise, Double D burst out into a fit of giggles and Nat's anger couldn't help but slowly ebb away. He desperately fought internally to keep his angry emotions, but they wouldn't stay. Fucking giggles. Nat had half a mind to shut Double D up with his hand. Or his foot. Or his face. "Let's just head out, shall we? There are a number of exhibits I wished to see today."

"Awesome," Nat found himself saying even though the idea of staring at bored animals didn't exactly appeal to him. It would have been slightly more fun if he'd been going with someone who didn't make him feel like an idiot. And Kevin liked this guy? Weird.

-8-8-

As it turned out, Double D didn't have any method of transportation. Apparently he'd been expecting to hitch a ride off Kevin's bike. Nat hadn't really prepared himself for a long day's journey at the zoo. He was only going to spy on the rendezvous point to make sure the initial transaction went smoothly. Because of this, they had to resort to riding public transportation which obviously meant having to sit shoulder to shoulder on a crowded bus and try not to rub too hard against each other every time the bus hit a bump.

Nat knew offhand that Double D didn't like being touched so intimately, or in this case, not-so-much-intimate-as-it-was-forced. If Double D were Kevin, Nat wouldn't feel so overwhelmed just by sitting next to him. He could feel tiny beads of perspiration on the back of his neck and he just knew that once they were off the bus, he'd feel the sweat from under his arms. Way to make him feel uncomfortable the rest of the day, useless bodily functions.

Double D, at least, had opted for a window seat and decided it was going to be a good idea to point out everything in his view along the way. His inherit enthusiasm was actually a little endearing. It helped Nat keep his mind off the fact that every time the bus made a right turn, he was practically squishing Double D against the window.

"I'm a little surprised," Nat said after the third stop had him practically sitting in Double D's lap, "that you even suggested taking the bus. Don't you hate this kind of thing?"

"There are pros and cons to every method of transportation," Double D said matter-of-factly. "It is important that we strive for a more fuel efficient economy. Surely I can withstand a few minutes on a crowded bus if it means keeping our planet a little healthier."

"If you wanted to be this close to me, you could have just said," Nat deadpanned.

Double fell quiet and just looked out the window. Confused, Nat wanted to press further, but he somehow felt it was overstepping boundaries. He'd only been teasing—it was in his primary nature to tease. He hadn't meant anything by it. Should he apologize?

Before Nat could say anything, Double D suddenly gasped and pointed out the window, "The signs are getting closer together; we're almost there!"

Nat leaned across Double D to get a better look out the window. Huh. The ride was a bit shorter than he thought. Signs for the City Zoo lined nearly every lamp-post on the main street toward the attraction as if motorists couldn't see them clearly enough. Nat had to give the advertising people props, though, because at least each sign showcased a different animal.

…which obviously meant Double D had to point out the Latin names of each species as they passed by.

"How do you keep all of that in your brain?" Nat wondered out loud.

Double D gave Nat a sheepish look. "How many song lyrics do you have memorized?"

"Touché," Nat shrugged. So Latin names were his song lyrics. That was fine by Nat. It actually gave him a little better perspective on the inner workings of Double D's mind, though. Maybe he didn't know the lyrics to any songs and just sort of hummed the tune so that it would save space on the hard drive of his mind for silly things like_ panthera leo_.

Once they were given the okay to disembark, the two teens stepped onto the asphalt and immediately gave each other enough elbow room to stretch their arms. Nat really hoped the bus wouldn't be that crowded on the way back—especially since there was a good chance he'd be a sweaty mess if they had to walk everywhere in the Late Fall heat. Nat remembered when Octobers used to be jacket and sweater weather, not air conditioner weather. On the bright side, he could always buy an overpriced frozen lemonade, so not all was lost.

"Before we go in," Double D said as he gazed up at the completely overdone Zoo entrance. "I want to get a picture of us at the front. Hold on while I find someone."

Nat raised an eyebrow. A picture? "Make sure they get my good side!" He called after Double D who only gave him a thumbs up in reply.

He returned a few short seconds later with an older gentleman who gladly snapped a photo of Double D and Nat, once again, standing shoulder to shoulder. When the camera was returned to Double D, the first thing he did was study the picture under the harsh glare of the sun.

"It's good enough," Nat said, hoping to hurry Double D along to the ticket counter. "I'm in the picture, I make every picture awesome."

"Yes, but I wanted to be sure he didn't cut off our heads or our feet," Double D muttered as he tried to cover his camera review screen enough to allow him to see the picture. Direct sunlight was a bitch to LED screens.

"Here," Nat sighed and finally offered his assistance. He cupped his hands around the screen so that Double D could lean in and take a peek. Somewhere along the way, Double D's reluctance for human contact had been squashed away—probably because he'd been flooded with Nat on the bus trip there, but he didn't even bat an eyelid before burying his face in Nat's hands.

"Perfect!" came Double D's muffled voice. He pulled his face from the makeshift darkroom of Nat's hands and grinned up at him. "You have a lovely smile, Nathan."

"I could have told you that," Nat said automatically, but he couldn't help standing a little taller. Compliments from anyone, no matter who they were, were always something to feel good about.

And really, Double D wasn't so bad. Nat had no idea why he was holding such a grudge about the entire thing. Was he really just mad that Kevin liked him? It was kind of petty on his part because Double D was a really cool guy, even if he did actually have a strap for his camera and wore it around his neck like some god awful tourist. It was adorable, in a way.

Nat decided then and there that he was going to stop thinking of Double D as the class genius and fungi enthusiast and start thinking of him as a guy he'd really like to get to know. Maybe this pretend date was a blessing. Double D seemed to be making the best of it—why couldn't Nat?

"Ticket time?" Nat offered when he felt Double D had taken enough pictures of the zoo's front entrance decorations. Double D calmly put his camera down and nodded. Once they reached the front gate, Nat pulled his billfold from his back pocket faster than Double D could rummage through his fanny pack.

Honestly. A fanny pack.

It had been hiding under Double D's baggy red shirt so Nat hadn't noticed, but when he did, he had to stifle a snort and it set him into a slight coughing fit.

Double D frowned at Nat's reaction. "Are you allergic to something, Nathan?"

"Yeah, probably," Nat choked. He wiped a tear from his eye and booted Double D to the side with his hip. "Let me pay for the tickets today. To apologize on Kevin's behalf."

"How kind of you, Nathan," Double D said and stepped back with such flare that Nat thought he must have imagined how know-it-all Double D sounded. If it he didn't know any better, Double D might have expected Nat to pay.

He couldn't have known about the whole Kevin thing, right? Impossible.

Nat did his guilt-ridden duties and coughed up the money for their tickets and handed the stubs to Double D who tucked them both away into his fanny pack, zipped it up, and re-positioned his shirt over the atrocious accessory.

Nat watched the entire process and finally had to ask, "A fanny pack, Double D?"

"They're extremely useful."

"And extremely ridiculous."

"So are popped collars," Double D pointed out.

Instinctively, Nat reached for the collar of his white undershirt but instead of smoothing it down, he tried to pop it up even more. "Popped collars are stylish, I'll have you know."

"And hip pouches are convenient," Double D reiterated. "Having established that, I would like to see the hoofed mammals, first. Their habitats are to the right. Would you be opposed to seeing the whole park in a counter clockwise fashion? It will bring us the maximum enjoyment and shelter from the sunlight as well as the least wear and tear on footwear due to the terrain."

"Did you study this place before you left?"

"I memorized the map and topography if that's what you are implying."

Nat whistled, clearly impressed. "Man, I need to take you everywhere. You're fucking brilliant."

Despite probably hearing this statement over and over again, Double D actually blushed and turned around just so that Nat couldn't see the blush—but he totally did. He did and he cherished it because making anyone blush was just about the funnest thing to do. Ever.

Double D cleared his throat. "Shall we?"

"Lead the way, navigator," Nat teased, but it was in good faith. To have such a well-balanced inner compass was nothing to poke fun at. That could be useful if they were ever, say, lost at sea.

As it turned out, hoofed mammals had a really broad category. Nat figured they were just going to look at antelopes or cows or something, but apparently giraffes, zebras and weird animals Nat had never heard of counted as well.

They came to a particularly obscure mammal that looked like nature threw up some leftover parts and called it a day.

"That," Nat said to the animal munching on some really dry looking veggies, "Is just about the most ridiculous thing I've seen all day next to your fanny pack."

Double D brushed the rude comment aside as if it never happened. Nat got the feeling he probably heard shit like that all the time. He wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not, though, and figured he should probably think about it later. Much later. Or at all, really. "That's an Okapi. _Okapia johnstoni_."

"Johnstoni?" Nat repeated. "Now you're just making shit up."

"No really," Double D giggled and pointed to the sign. "It was named for the explorer who took a specimen back to Europe with him to study."

Nat squinted and tilted his head. "It looks like a giraffe-cow-zebra-moose."

Double D's giggling didn't stop and when Nat finally pulled his gaze from the giraffe-cow-zebra-moose, he couldn't help but watch Double D's face light up with his laughter. Sure, Nat had seen the guy laugh before, but it was never like this. Never this intimate.

Before a blush actually crept up on Nat's cheeks, he turned away quickly. "Well it does."

"I agree," Double D nodded and pulled away from the railing. "The elephants are next. I heard one of them is pregnant. How fascinating!"

One of the elephants was indeed pregnant. If Nat thought a normal, non-pregnant elephant was huge, then seeing one halfway along was another statement entirely. How did that thing even walk? Double D had out his camera and was meandering in between other patrons just to get different angles. The bulbous gray blob in front of him was hard to look at mostly because it looked painful, so Nat much preferred to watch Double D instead.

Double D's enthusiasm for the zoo was refreshing. Nat kind of felt bad for thinking ill of him earlier. Here he thought the zoo would be the perfect date spot, but it was turning out to be just another learning opportunity—and it wasn't even that bad. The way Double D described everything made Nat actually enjoy learning.

Maybe this was what Kevin saw in Double D: the potential to see the world in a different point of view. Nat had been hesitant at first, but, really, why should he be?

Double D had been nothing but kind to him and here Nat was poking fun at him at every turn. He really needed to step up his friendship game, because just paying for tickets wouldn't be enough.

Nat pushed himself from the wall on which he was leaning and moved directly behind Edd so that he could reach around and lower his camera. "Come on, Double D, I think the poor elephants have had enough paparazzi for one day."

Double D turned around, which Nat hadn't been expecting. Their faces were so close and their fingers brushed on top of the camera where they met. Something twisted in Nat's lower gut and he pulled back quickly. He knew his face was red and he couldn't stop it.

With a grin, Double D quickly held up his camera and took a picture of Nat's embarrassment.

"Having fun?" Double D asked, his voice once again coy.

Nat practically glared at the sock-head. He wanted to be coy, did he? If Nat didn't know any better, he'd say that Double D was trying to flirt with him. In fact, he probably _was_ flirting—but to what gain? Purposely? Accidentally? As a joke? Either way, two could play at that game.

"Tons," Nat answered and immediately snaked an arm around Double D's waist so that he could effectively lead him away from the elephant habitat.

Double D didn't pull away, which was the first thing Nat noticed. The second was that he actually leaned in to Nat's side like he'd been hoping for this. Nat could practically feel the body heat rise between them.

Well, that had been unexpected. The worst part (or possibly best) was that Nat couldn't even pull away. He didn't want to. He actually enjoyed the way they kind of fit well together. And, really, it turned out Double D's fanny pack was useful for hooking Nat's thumb through so that he could casually keep his arm around Double D without tiring himself out. Lazy flirting. So awesome.

As the day progressed, the two of them took the unspoken game further.

At the aquarium, Double D took hold of Nat's hand and helped point out the various fish so that they would see them from the same line of sight.

At the monkey house, Nat imitated the chimpanzees by pretending to pick food out of Double D's hat and eat it so often that Double D began to swat Nat's hand away. By the fifth time, Double D simply took hold of Nat's hand and didn't let go.

They held hands all through the Herpitarium. Nat had no idea when their fingers laced themselves together, but he wanted to take credit for that one.

As they made their way down the path to the outdoor bear habitats, Double D let go of Nat's hand for the first time, but only enough to take out his camera and look around again.

Nat's hand felt a little cold and empty without Double D's surrounding it. Somewhere along the way, he'd forgotten they weren't flirting for real and actually became accustomed to Double D's voice next to his ear. "Looking for a picture spot?" he prompted.

"I couldn't take photos inside any buildings," Double D explained. "I'd like to make up for it, now. Ah!" he pointed toward a couple walking on the other side of the path and hurried toward them.

When he returned a few seconds later, he scurried to Nat's empty side and leaned in to him. Thankful for the close presence again, Nat quickly wrapped his arm around Double D's waist like it belonged there.

It wasn't until Double D placed his head on Nat's shoulder for the picture that Nat felt his heart really start to pound in his chest. The couple that took their picture smiled widely at them as they handed back the camera. Nat swore he heard them say what a cute couple he and Double D made.

Nat's arm was still around Double D's waist as he reviewed the picture. If Nat thought his heart wanted to leap from his chest before, when Double D held up the camera so that Nat could see, his heart wasn't even beating anymore. It was doing somersaults.

They looked really good together. Nat was only slightly taller than Double D, but it worked for them. The way they were smiling made it look that they were a genuine couple, too. Nat wasn't even sure if he was faking it anymore.

"It looks good," Nat said eventually. He figured it was up to him to say something.

"Doesn't it?" Double D agreed. He let his camera drop around his neck, but he was still looking up at Nat. "I think it captures the day perfectly."

What, Nat thought to himself, the kind of day where the two of them pretended to be flirting for whatever strange reason? Then again, the day was kind of built on lies in the first place. It was fitting for the two of them to spend the rest of the day swimming in lies, right? Then why did Nat feel so shitty about it? He needed this to stop before either of them actually got hurt. It was fun while it lasted, but he needed to bring himself back to the universe where he and Double D were just friends and not… whatever this was. "It's too bad I'm not Kevin, right?"

The smile slowly faded from Double D's face. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You were supposed to go on this date with Kevin," Nat said slowly. "And instead you got me."

Double D was quiet for a second. His eyes flitted around Nat's face and all Nat could think about was that he was probably counting his freckles. "I'm glad I'm here with you," he said eventually. He brought his gaze up to meet Nat's. "I think, given all the options, I've been left with the best case scenario."

He smiled, then, causing Nat's own eyes to move from Double D's eyes to the gap in his teeth and then he was gone, making his way down the path. "Come on, Nathan!" he called. "I want to see the Great American Black Bear! _Ursus Americanus_!"

Nat wanted to stand there and think about what Double D had said. Surely there had to be a larger meaning behind it, right? He couldn't just take things at face value, because if he did, then that meant that Double D would rather be at the zoo with Nat than with Kevin which made absolutely no sense at all.

Then again, he wasn't particular broken up about Kevin's no-show.

Double D stopped walking long enough to reach a hand behind him and wiggle his fingers and that was all the incentive Nat needed to tell his brain to shut the fuck up and catch up with Double D—just so that they could lace their fingers together where they belonged.

_End of Part I._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes: **THERE. I would like to point out two things:

1) Seeing as this is written in Nat's POV, the narrative is very personal and jumpy. Nat thinks that's cool, okay.  
2) I understand that this might move a little too fast for some people but I like it. If you've ever been in a situation where you unexpectedly fell for someone and always wanted to jump their bones, you will get this fic. This is a real phenomenon.

ALSO: Trigger warning. This chapter is not for Arachnophobes.

* * *

It was amazing how no matter how many times Nat had been to the local zoo, somehow seeing it through Double D's eyes made it a thousand times more interesting. He remembered coming here once and glaring at all the sleeping animals and empty cages. If he really wanted to see some animal action, he'd watch the Discovery Channel. Seeing them in real life didn't exactly do it for him.

Except Double D somehow turned every single exhibit into some kind of fantastic attraction. Maybe the animals sensed his enthusiasm because they even performed slightly interesting feats in their presence. One of the sunbears yawned and stretched which shouldn't have been as exciting as it was, but it sent Double D into a frenzy and he had to take half a dozen pictures of the act before he was satisfied.

Nat didn't mind Double D's picture-taking addiction. It was nice. The only problem was that Nat somehow lost at a kind of flirting gay chicken and now wanted to hold Double D's hand all the time. If Double D was taking pictures, he couldn't be holding Nat's hand and that genuinely sucked.

Nat had to resort to stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans as if that would somehow simulate human contact. It's not like the weather outside was cold—it was just that if his hands came into contact with open air, it reminded him all the more on just how much he really liked Double D's palm touching his.

It was so stupid. He hadn't gone into this arrangement liking Double D, had he? Was he being fickle? It was hard telling, especially when Double D bent over the side of the railing to get a better angle for a picture and Nat got a nice view of that Double Derriere. It was ripe for the grabbing and, ironically enough, if this had been a normal outing and not a date, he would have wasted no time in grabbing Double D's ass, but now he was a confused mess of emotions and couldn't decide if that would be sending a wrong signal or not.

Maybe this was all in Double D's plan. Maybe he was being confused on purpose—to force Nat into thinking one way so that he would act accordingly. Was it a failsafe? Did Double D know Nat's inherit nature and purposely acted in such a way that it would cause him to stumble off the main path and crash into an uneven tangle of feelings?

Double D was clearly so much more cunning than Nat gave him credit for. Then again, if there was something fishy going on at school, chances were, Double D and his Ed-friends were behind it. Perhaps Nat should have prepared himself a bit better for today.

"Nathan," came Double D's dulcet tone. Oh god, he was describing Double D's voice as 'dulcet,' now. That wasn't a good sign. Was it possible to fall so fast after a few measly touches? Nat had made out with dozens of people and never felt this needy for something. Fuck Double D and his master psychological warfare. "The path deviates to two locations. Which would you like to visit first, the Sea Lions or the Insectarium?"

Seeing as bugs were really the grossest things on the planet, Nat was about to immediately offer up the Sea Lions, but when he looked down that particular path, it was filled to the brim with tourists and strollers and people who walked less than a half a mile an hour. The Insectarium was relatively light on humans—probably because no sane person liked looking at bugs.

Except Double D.

But after today Nat was pretty sure he wasn't sane.

"The…. Insectarium?" Nat tried. He winced a little as he said it. There were probably spiders in there. Granted, they were behind glass, but still. Spiders.

"Excellent choice!" Double D beamed. He actually let his camera go back to dangling around his neck so that he could take hold of Nat's left arm with both his hands. "I'm sure there are species in there that I have yet to categorize in my personal collection. It would be very interesting to see them up close."

Nat allowed Double D to pull his hand from his pocket if it meant they could clasp fingers again. He also couldn't say no to a Double D that was practically vibrating with excitement over something as mundane as insects. With a deep breath, Nat let himself be dragged down the hill toward the opening to the Insectarium which was tastefully created to look like they were stepping into the mouth of a giant beetle, pincers and all. It wasn't a comforting thought.

As it turned out, if Nat wanted to have some alone time to cuddle with Double D, he'd made the wrong choice to try to do it in that building. Sure, it wasn't as crowded as other portions of the zoo, but that made Double D feel as though he could bounce around to the exhibits and mutter to himself, as if he were taking mental notes.

At least Nat didn't have to look at every individual bug. He could stay toward the more docile specimens, like the dead beetle display on the wall. That way if the glass spontaneously broke, he wasn't going to have a biting, stinging, or poisonous creature crawling up his pant leg.

While Double D pinged around the Insectarium, Nat took the chance to check his phone for texts, mostly out of habit. He wasn't at all surprised to see something from Kevin. After all, the guy was grounded and he'd only told the mysterious unblocked number that was supposed to be Double D. He hadn't told Nat, technically, so Nat naturally assumed it would be Kevin explaining his situation.

Except it wasn't.

_Having fun with Double Dork?_

Nat stared hard at his phone. For all intents and purposes, Kevin should have absolutely no idea that he was at the zoo with Double D. If everything had gone according to plan, Kevin should have thought he texted Double D with a cancellation and everyone would have gone about their day as normal. The only difference now was that Nat had taken Kevin's spot on the date train.

So how did Kevin know? Rather than ask him outright, Nat figured if the world was going to play mind games with him, then he was going to play mind games with the world. He would just not admit it. That would work swimmingly, right? He texted Kevin back with a quick, '_I have no idea what you're talking about_,' and stuffed his phone aside angrily.

After a bit, Nat heard a tiny, "Nathan, come see this," from the far end of the Insectarium. Nat had no idea Double D wandered off that far and made a quick jog to his location.

Double D was hovering around a completely enclosed glass tank. The case stood on a podium in the center of the room so that observers could get the entire 360 degree look. Double D circled around it, eyes bright and mouth open in wonder. Nat was about to ask just what it was that he was looking at when he spotted the subject in the center of its web.

"Holy crap!" Nat shouted, a bit startled at suddenly seeing the spider. He took a rather large step back, which was actually considered three steps and found himself practically in the next room. "Is that a Black Widow?"

"Yeah," Double D breathed. He ducked this way and that and when he finally got the angle he wanted, he reached a hand out again and motioned for Nat to come back toward him. "I can understand why they displayed her in a 360 degree tank. This way one can see the signature abdomen markings. Come look!"

Nat glared at the spider, but he glared at Double D harder for making him come back and see. Maybe this was also part of Double D's sinister plan: make Nat want to cling to him all day long and then subject Nat to his worst fears and laugh about it later.

And yet his feet were walking toward Double D and the Black Widow of Death anyway.

When he made it to Double D's side, the other teen grabbed Nat's hand and tugged him downward so that he could look at the gigantic butt of one of the most poisonous spiders in the world. Nat liked butts, but he didn't like this particular butt. If it weren't so poisonous and bulbous and creepy, the red hourglass pattern would have been pretty cool.

"That's creepy," Nat felt the need to point out.

"It's beautiful," Double D countered.

Suddenly, for whatever reason unknown to mankind, the Black Widow felt the need to start wiggling around on its web, its spindly legs flailing around like it had no idea what it was doing. For all Nat knew, it was legitimately shouting "BOO" at the top of its tiny spider lungs.

The effect was immediate. Nat let out a string of curses and jumped what felt like a mile. It was like a wasp buzzed by his ear or something and he ducked without any real rhyme or reason. In the process, however, he managed to elbow Double D hard enough to send him toppling to the floor and without a Double D to balance him out, Nat fell conveniently on top of him.

Double D's laughter would have echoed off the walls if there wasn't carpet all over the place. He quickly began to prop himself up on his elbows so that Nat could de-tangle their limbs a bit. "Are you okay? She can't get you, you know. She's trapped."

"I know that!" Nat spat, deliberately looking everywhere but at the Spider Cage behind him. "Doesn't make it any less terrifying. Can we go, now?" Nat pulled himself back to a sitting position. Except for a few minor bumps, he was relatively unscathed. Double D didn't seem to be complaining of any injury, either, so their little tumble was more embarrassment than anything.

Double D sat up with Nat and ducked his head a bit so that he could properly study Nat's face. Nat felt a bit too exposed under Double D's scrutinizing stare but he couldn't look away. There were spiders in tanks everywhere. It was like he was literally being forced to make eye contact with Double D because there was simply _nowhere else to look._

"Nathan," Double D began, his mocking tone abandoned for now. "Do you have arachnophobia?"

"No!" Nat defended quickly. "I'm not afraid of spiders. They're just creepy."

"I'm fairly certain that's in the same category," Double D deadpanned.

"Is not," Nat fought. "There's just too many of them in here. I think I'd like it a lot better if we were not in the same room."

"You do realize that all the insects outside aren't safely tucked away in glass tanks, right?" Double D just _had _to point out.

Nat shot him a harsh stare. "Way to make me never want to go outside, again."

"It's okay, Nathan," Double D sounded like he was fighting back a giggle. Was this how he got his kicks? Torturing people with spiders? "I can assure you that most insects truly are more afraid of you than you are of them."

"Yeah," Nat scoffed. "Most."

"Hey," Double D's voice took another step back, like he was only sarcastic fifty percent of the time. "I apologize for taking you in here. I had no idea you would react like this. Would you like to see the Sea Lions?"

If Nat weren't the manliest man among all the manly men he knew, then he would have pouted and nodded and allowed Double D to escort him from the building like some kind of Knight in Shining Armor—but he had a reputation to uphold. He steeled his resolve and shook his head before starting to stand up. "I'm good. You wanted to see the bugs."

"Nathan," Double D stopped him by placing a hand on his upper arm. Nat paused as if Double D had some mysterious invisible remote and could easily command Nat to do whatever he pleased. "I'm serious. We can leave."

Nat's eyes moved from where Double D was touching his arm all the way up to the concerned expression on his face. "It's your ruined date," he sadly reminded Double D. "You get to choose what we do."

"I wouldn't call it ruined," Double D said slowly. "I already explained it to you: this was the best case scenario."

"You mean," Nat pointed to himself just to be sure he was hearing that properly. "You would rather have gone on a date with me, than with Kevin?"

Double D didn't exactly confirm his answer. He only grinned, the bastard.

"But you and Kevin-?"

"Come on," Double D interrupted him and finally let the two of them stand up. A few bug enthusiasts were staring at them from across the room. It must have looked really strange to see two teenage boys sitting on the floor having some kind of meaningful conversation. "Let's go see the Sea Lions."

"But-!"

"_Zalophus californianus_, Nathan."

Nat groaned loudly and followed Double D out of the Insectarium. The harsh glare of the mid-afternoon sun hurt his eyelids and he had to squint a little, which couldn't have been attractive. Nevertheless, Double D was grinning at him like the little good-looking shit he was.

"You owe me an explanation," Nat demanded. Sea Lions be damned. He could hear their mocking barks in the distance.

"I really don't feel as though I should explain anything," Double D shrugged. "Have I not been very forward in my actions?"

"You mean… all of that?" Nat gestured to the entire half the zoo they'd already visited. "I thought you were playing some fucked up version of gay chicken!"

Double D looked a little hurt, but it could also have been in Nat's mind because the sun was still making him squint and obscuring his sight. "If memory serves me right, that is not how one plays the incredibly childish game of 'gay chicken.'" Double D drawled in his know-it-all voice.

"And what do you know about gay chicken?" Nat spat.

"I know enough to know that I wouldn't lose," Double D retaliated with equal enthusiasm.

Well this was just an interesting turn of events. Kevin apparently knew Nat was with Double D and Double D was apparently pleased as punch to be on a date with Nat to the point that he was practically daring Nat to kiss him.

How could everything in the world simultaneously go right and wrong at the same time? It was like his entire plan failed but in the best possible way.

"Okay," Nat said eventually, while trying to sort everything out in his head. "But what about Kevin? Where does he play into all this? I thought you two were…?"

"Friends?" Double D offered. That wasn't at all what Nat was going to say, but he could handle that answer. "We are to the point that I have his phone number. There's no reason for him to text me from a blocked number and vice versa."

"Um," Nat said intelligently.

"And furthermore, Kevin is grounded."

Nat threw his hands up in the air in frustration. These very important bits of information would have been very nice to have a few days ago when he was formulating his scheme. The rest of the story was easy enough to figure out. Kevin and Double D clearly collaborated behind his back to set this all up.

Why didn't he see it before?

Those weren't googly eyes of love shot to each other from across the room—they were probably mutually shared winks of backstabbing and betrayal. Nat wanted to punch something right in the face.

Instead, he decided it would be in his best interest to march over to the sea lions and stare at them long and hard until they stopped barking. Naturally it didn't work, but at least the non-stop noise was distracting enough to keep him from saying something he would regret.

Double D was at his side in an instant, his mouth close to Nat's ear so that Nat could clearly hear him over the cacophony of sea lions. "I apologize if I've offended you. I realize that pulling off as scheme of this magnitude is a bit petty, but must I also point out that you were trying to do the same thing?"

"Ugh," Nat groaned. "But I was trying to set you two up out of the goodness of my heart!"

"Don't you think that perhaps Kevin was doing the same as well?" Double D murmured. "I admire your loyalty to each other. If you're going to be cross with anyone, take it out on me. This was my idea. Kevin was only a collaborator at my request. I simply saw the opportunity and I took it."

Nat stopped watching the sea lions bark for a second to turn and face Double D. "So my elaborate scheme was really your elaborate scheme… to get into my pants?" That was a bit more reassuring. It certainly beat Nat's theory that they were secretly laughing about how ridiculous Nat had been behaving all day.

"I wouldn't quite place it that far, but yes, I have been quite sincere in my actions," Double D said. His words started out confident, but Nat could see the blush fill his cheeks. It was like Double D's flush had a direct line to Nat's groin because hearing and seeing the truthfulness in the confession was a little much for him.

"Oh my God, you could have just told me like a normal person," Nat complained. It would have saved him from how many embarrassing situations? Including the one he was in currently.

"I was unaware of your feelings," Double D tried to explain over the barking of the sea lions, but his words were getting lost. "I wanted to be sure."

"I was unaware of my own fee—hold on," Nat stopped mid-sentence and turned to face the still loud sea lions and shouted directly at them. "_Shut the fuck up, will you_? You're ruining my heartfelt love confession!"

Silence fell over the sea lion habitat. It could have been because Nat yelled at the animals or it could have been because a zookeeper had opened a door in the back and was walking in with fish so all the sea lions were busy waddling and flapping over to get their meal.

Either way, Nat could finally hear Double D properly. Zoo patrons shuffled around them on either side to watch the sea lions guzzle down some slightly dead fish and ended up herding Nat and Double D to the outside of the crowd, but at that point, Nat didn't even mind. His personal bubble only encompassed him and Double D and no one else.

"As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted," Nat stated. "I didn't even know I—"

For the second time, Nat was interrupted, not by barking sea lions, but by a pair of lips on his own. It wasn't a particularly long kiss, but it wasn't by any means short, either. It was just long enough to effectively shut Nat up and leave him sputtering after a very smiling and very gap-toothed Double D.

"I understand," Double D said as he rolled back on the balls of his feet. "I could tell, all the way back at the elephant habitat."

"And you never told me?"

"Would you have accepted it if I did?"

Nat thought on that and realized he probably wouldn't have. He hadn't yet been eased into the idea that he probably liked the sockheaded genius. Yeah, he'd been hesitant to spend the day with Double D at first, but mostly out of intimidation. He didn't know Double D that well. He had no idea he could be anything more than Kevin's adorable neighbor.

"So you basically gambled on whether or not this date would go as you hoped," Nat summed up the situation nicely, he thought.

"If you did not reciprocate, then I would have had a lovely afternoon at the zoo with you," Double D said with a smile. "And if you did reciprocate, then, I suppose I am lucky."

Nat couldn't help but burst out into laughter and threw an arm around Double D's waist to pull him in close because now he could do that as he pleased. "You're such a manipulative asshole."

"Language, Nathan. There are children about."

"Oh, now you're worried about my language," Nat teased. Despite their outward bickering, Double D actually leaned in to Nat's arm as they walked. The atmosphere around them didn't even seem to change too much. Now that Nat knew they were flirting for the sake of mutual attraction and not for the sake of… whatever, he thought the dynamic between the two of them would change, but it didn't.

It still took a bit of getting used to—knowing that every time Double D found someone to take a picture of them, he wasn't doing it for blackmail, but for actual memories. Each time they took another picture, the two of them grew closer, as if now that they'd established a confession, they couldn't stand to be more than two feet apart.

The picture taken in front of meerkat display had Nat standing behind Double D with his arms wrapped around his waist and his head resting on his shoulder.

By the time they reached the zoo exit, Double D had them pose just outside the front gate, very close to where they'd taken their first picture. It started out as a simple pose with the two of them standing side by side with their arms around each other, but the lady taking the picture felt the need to call out, "Say cheese!" just before she snapped a shot. This gave Nat the perfect opportunity to lower his hand and give Double D's ass the squeeze he'd been dying to dish out all day.

Double D jumped just as the flash went off and Nat couldn't help but burst out laughing. When the lady asked if they wanted to re-do the picture, Nat waved it off. Double D had his pictures. Nat could have one, too.

As they waited for the bus, the two of them sat side by side on the bus stop bench, hunched over Double D's camera so that they could review all the pictures from the day. Because the sun had been so forgiving, many of the shots turned out perfect. Natural sunlight was, after all, the best flash.

Suddenly Nat could understand why Double D requested so many pictures of them together. Nat could actually see the progression they'd made in just the span of one day. They started out their journey as friends and ended it as, well, as friends, but with something a little bit more.

"You'll have to e-mail me all these pics, okay?" Nat nudged Double D's knee with his own. "You don't get to hog all the memories."

"I won't. I mean. I will. I'll e-mail them to you. I won't hog the memories, as you said," Double D stammered a little as he turned his camera off.

It was funny. The entire day, Double D had been a sassy and manipulative motherfucker but now that the date was coming to a close, he was suddenly going to crawl into his shell and be shy? Nat was far too gone to deal with that. "At least you didn't get any pictures of me in that Insectarium. We can just forget that entire thing happened."

"I don't want to forget it," Double D said quietly as he fiddled with the dials on his camera. "It was the highlight of my day other than, well, you know."

"No, I don't know," Nat grinned as he tried to lay on the charm. Thick. "Please, remind me."

"Other than you telling sea lions to shut up!" Double D clearly lied, but Nat understood him perfectly and they exchanged a knowing grin. Nat's face hurt from smiling so much. He wanted to pull his lips down to keep them from splitting his cheeks open. "I had no idea spiders had such an effect on you. I've never seen you so vulnerable before. If I'd been a little more confident, I would have kissed you in there."

"Oh thank God you didn't," Nat sighed loudly. "Our first kiss surrounded by spiders? Please."

"As opposed to being surrounded by rude zoo patrons?"

"We could have another, you know. Surrounded by irritated people waiting for public transportation."

"You're so romantic."

"You don't know the half of it."

Double D was giggling and it would have been terrible of Nat to make a statement and then not deliver on it. In order to give Double D a bit of a warning, Nat reached a hand out to lightly touch Double D's jawbone with his fingertips before tilting his head a bit to seal the deal.

Because they were sitting and because Nat had felt like the entire day had worked him up to this point, he wasn't at all upset when this kiss lasted far longer than their first. At first Nat thought he should count the kisses, but their lips moved against each other so often that he lost count.

Nat knew his mouth was attached to his head which was attached to his body, but for some reason nothing mattered except the point where his mouth collided with Double D's. His entire focus landed directly on the movement of each kiss and the taste of Double D's lips on his own. He had no idea what his hands or his feet or even his lungs were doing and it didn't really matter to him. He must have still been in shock mode because he was actually kissing Double D, and Double D was kissing back. In fact, there was a shit ton of mutual kissing and it wasn't even bad.

Sure, Nat had to adjust a little because everyone had a different technique for making out. Double D's in particular focused on a lot of tiny kisses, each one only slightly different, like he was trying to kiss Nat in all the ways from one to a hundred. Nat didn't mind at all. He only tried to keep up.

They didn't pull away until the screech of the air breaks from the bus tore them apart. Both boys were breathing heavily and it wasn't until then that Nat realized he'd been staggering his breathing. Had all of that even been automatic? Yeah, he'd made out with people before but hot damn, it had never been so localized.

Just as Nat began to stand up to board the bus, he inwardly groaned. Thank God they were going to sit down again on the bus because Nat found himself with a growing problem. Double D, having been prepared for such a nuisance, casually shifted his fanny pack to the front of his waist like he hid boners from society all the time. Jerk. Adorable jerk. Hurry-and-get-back-on-the-bus-for-more-kissing jerk.

Despite clearly having enough room, Nat and Double D took two seats next to each other and let the bus's tendency to smash the two of them against the window every time it turned do the rest of the work.

By the time they arrived back at Peach Creek, Nat was pretty sure he'd memorized Double D's scent. He knew his clothes smelled like him. At some point, however, Nat knew the two of them would have to go their separate ways; he just didn't think it would be so soon. Almost the second Double D stepped off the bus, he pulled out his cell phone to check the time.

"I promised Ed and Eddy I'd do something with them, tonight," Double D explained after seeing Nat's probably very inquisitive look. He'd made sure to furrow his brow and everything.

Nat didn't even bother to hide his whine at the news, "Can't you just ditch them and make out with me all night? I like that plan. I like that plan a _lot_."

Double D just grinned and dodged a few of Nat's grabby hands. He'd gotten accustomed to those rather quickly, Nat noticed. "I will not abandon my two best friends after a promise. However… I will text you, if that is okay?"

"I'm good with that. Texting is good. Texting is awesome," Nat's brain wasn't working very well. His blood was fueling the wrong head. The worst part was that now he had to walk home practically bow-legged.

"Perhaps we can see each other again tomorrow," Double D stated. He was already walking backward toward the direction of his house. Nat had grown so accustomed to the close proximity that it was almost painful to watch him walk away.

"Yeah," Nat echoed, "Tomorrow."

The two of them watched each other for a second. It was Nat who gave in first by rushing forward for one last quick kiss before they had to separate entirely. Double D reciprocated easily enough, but he was laughing against Nat's lips before too long.

"I need to go. They're waiting for me," Double D practically spoke inside of Nat's mouth.

"Tomorrow," Nat repeated. "You promised." Even though he really didn't, but now that Nat said the words they had to be true.

"Go home, Nathan."

"Yeah, yeah," Nat grudgingly began his trek toward home. He had to force himself not to look over his shoulder at Double D or he wouldn't get anywhere. And, really, he as much as he wanted to spend all of his time from then on out with the guy, he needed to have some space to clear his head.

As the distance between the two of them progressed, so did the working synapses of Nat's brain.

He felt like he'd been hit by a train. A very adorable gap-toothed, sockheaded genius train but still.

Had he always liked Double D but it never came to fruition because of the lack of mutual contact? How had he fallen so hard and so fast? He'd paid attention in English class. He'd read Shakespeare's plays. He knew how fast some fictional characters fell for others, but surely it couldn't happen in real life? It was like one minute he was in love with the idea of Double D and the next they were making out at a bus stop.

And then there was the whole ordeal of Double D having to practically con Nat into a date because, well, from what Nat had gathered, he'd liked him for quite some time? How lucky for him. How lucky for both of them.

Nat's brain moved a mile a second. It was like Double D had planted a seed and gave it all kinds of plant steroids and miracle grow because Nat was completely done for. His phone buzzed in his pocket and Nat was so shocked that he nearly dropped it as he scrambled to read the incoming text.

It wasn't from Double D like he'd hoped, but from Kevin.

_Looks like you two had fun_.

Was Double D home already? Had Kevin seen him walk through the cul-de-sac? Nat hadn't even noticed how fast he'd been walking, himself. He'd been too lost in his thoughts. He quickly typed in a response to Kevin essentially telling him to shut up, but used more colorful language. He wasn't at all surprised to get a completely normal response back.

_Don't you dare hurt him. He may be a dork, but he went out on a limb for you._

Did Kevin actually think Nat was going to harm even one hair on Double D's head? Or hurt his feelings? Or any of the above? Nat couldn't even fathom it. Yeah, he'd had flings in the past, but they were flings. This was Double D. This was completely different. He didn't want to just grab Double D's ass. He wanted to be the only person to grab that ass. In fact that ass was exclusively the only ass he wanted to grab anymore, and that was saying something.

Nat punched in a response saying, '_Don't think you're off the hook just because you set us up. I looked like an idiot_.'

_You are an idiot and your plans suck._

Kevin was such a wonderful friend. Nat took back all those bad feelings he had at the beginning of the day when he thought he was hitting on Kevin's potential boyfriend. He was just about to retaliate with a snarky response when his phone buzzed with a text, but this time from Double D.

_I miss you already_.

Nat stopped in his tracks just outside the gates to his home and stared hard at the phone in his hand. He swallowed thickly and tried to ignore the flurry of feelings in his abdomen. He shouldn't be this affected by such a simple text but he couldn't help it. It was like they'd skipped about ten stages into their relationship and moved right to the honeymoon stage. It was awesome but also so completely overwhelming that Nat kind of wanted to explode on the pavement and just leave his bits to the birds.

Instead, however, he typed an equally as schmoopy response because no one in the world would read it except for the two of them. '_I miss you, too, Double Delicious._'

Fifteen seconds later, his phone buzzed again but this time with a picture of Ed and Eddy making kissy faces at the phone. The angle was off, indicating they'd taken it, themselves. Nat rolled his eyes but couldn't stop himself from smiling, anyway.

For once, he was perfectly happy that nothing went according to plan.

* * *

**Note**: THERE. NATEDD. I DID IT. :D


End file.
